Sunday, November 22, 2009

Spiritual Direction Canceled Indefinitely

     I have some scary news. 

     Fr. Hate didn't show up for spiritual direction, again.  He called me on Wednesday sounding very depressed and said that he really needed to talk.  Two hours later, I went to meet him for coffee and he didn't show.  Since then he hasn't been returning my calls.

     Today, I went to his rectory after Masses and he wasn't there.  The maid answered and told me that Fr. Hate was no longer in the parish and that Fr. Boundarilessi had been made temporary pastor.  When I asked what happened, she slammed the door in my face.  As I walked back to my car, Fr. Boundarilessi pulled out of the driveway.

     Our conversation:

     Fr. Boundarilessi!  Hold up, please.  Thank you.
     ...
     Good day to you, too, Fr. Boundarilessi.
     ...
     I'm happy to hear that you found the computer links enlightening.  So, I hear you've been made interim pastor?
     ... 
     I was supposed to meet Fr. Hate on Wednesday for a meeting and he skipped out.  He hasn't been returning my calls.  Is he okay?
     ...
     I realize that you can't tell a simple lay person about what happened to Fr. Hate, but I'm his friend and his spiritual director.  I'm worried.  Please, I need to speak with him.  
     ...
     Well, according to Catholic theology, I'm still a priest!  Those are your rules not mine.  But I don't won't to argue theology. I'm here because I care about Fr. Hate.  So...please, just let me know if he's okay.

     At this point, Fr. Boundarilessi called me a depraved sodomite and told me to stay away from Fr. Hate.  He told me that Fr. Hate was in the care of the church, that the situation was an internal issue, and that it was going to stay that way.  Then he told me that he would call the police if I ever returned to the parish.  After saying, "God bless," and throwing his cigarette butt at my feet, he sped off.

     I'm worried sick.  What happened to Fr. Hate?  Do any of you have any hypotheses?  I'd love to hear them.

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